Tags
BBM, Dating, Facebook, IM, Online Communities, Relationships, Social media, Twitter
Over the course of the last few years social media has become the preoccupation of every human being. The way in which technology used to be presented has changed with the demographic being widespread. Social media has created online communities in which people share ideas, jokes, photos etc via Facebook, Twitter, Google+ and so on. Looking at the statistics, Facebook leads this with online users on a daily basis. With more channels of communication we also have the use of Instant Messaging (IM) on platforms such as Blackberry Messenger (BBM) and Whatsapp. The way in which IM has evolved is by operating as another communication service and looks to replace Short Messaging Service (SMS). Facebook have also jumped on the bandwagon with their IM function with Facebook Chat.
The world has become smaller due to technology with todays communication channels. We can speak to people across the other side of the world, which enhances networking. This article links to how this is related to romantic relationships. Relationships come from a traditional ‘owner’ model where words are used by individuals such as ‘my boyfriend’ ‘my girlfriend’. There is logic of ownership in these phrases. What the phrase ‘MY’ gives is a connotation of what you’d like to know what ‘MY” partner is up to. Below will look at the pros and cons of social media and IM as it applies to relationships.
THE PROS
Staying Connected – Be able to communicate with your partner is important for couples I assume. This is about sharing what is going on with your life on a daily basis, whether it’s issues, compliments, joking with each other or more often rowing. The digital channels lets the other person know if they’re having a good or bad day and also follow-up on issues that they’re aware of. The good example of why staying connected over digital is to remind each other of planned dates and events. Without constant communication these can easily be forgotten, even a partners birthday.
Cost Effective – We live in a world today where the cost of living is increasing at a high rate and we’re always looking at ways to reduce expenses in one way or another i.e going on dates. What social media offers is a cost effective way to be able to communicate on a regular basis through Facebook, Skype, BBM and so on as well as those 2 hour phone calls. The point I’m trying to make is the length of your interaction over social media reduces the costs of going on dates to talk about how you day was. Obviously dating is a serious part to a relationship, but as the costs are low this is why couples embrace social media and IM.
Removes boredom – Think back to the 1800’s and how couples communicated? They wrote letters and met up. Fast forward 213 years and now we have all this. We can share photos to each other, play games such as doodle jump and Facetime. A person if at home that needs to work, but also at the same time is missing out on an event can be interacted through these medias. Likewise when at work when bored and fed up, you’d be surprised on the psychological effect a text does to a person’s attitude from the one person who can cheer them up.
THE CONS
Generates Rows – The mistrust created by social and IM can in-fact generate arguments and cause insecurities between couples. This ranges from rumours that have been spread, all the way to thoughts of your partner activities online, which prompts to see their online accounts – this creates trust issues. This often leads to someone being deleted, or deleting their account themselves and once the wind is blown over the account is re-actived.
Spreads negative publicity – Whether they’re true or false, rumours and actions can spread so fast online that the person it’s about potentially may harm them to be the last to know. The digital world gives an opportunity to people who are going through a nasty break up to hang out their dirty laundry. Couples have to be cautious on their private content as this could be shared once things go sour.
Escape from reality – Relationships can come with a high level of stress and this is why some people don’t bother being in one. It’s common that couples have arguments, but it’s the way it’s dealt with, which will provide a solution for these issues and problems. Some can resort to blanking their partner online and offline, which causes the other person to start revenge chatting online to the opposite sex. This may seem like the easy short-term solution, but the amount of times that relationships are then fixed, going back to the happy stage are then ruined once revenge chatting has being exposed. So you have to ask yourself – is it really worth it?
By Stefan Lasek